self-centered?

Yeah, I think so. That doesn't mean I don't try. Here, from Nisha at Politicoholic, 25 ways to kick start the revolution in your own universe.

And also, my thought of the day, courtesy of Thoreau:

My life is like a stroll upon the beach,
As near the ocean's edge as I can go;
My tardy steps its waves sometimes o'erreach,
Sometimes I stay to let them overflow.
~Thoreau, The Fisher's Boy

peace and love,
m

finish and start...

Sunday is that day that runs between the weeks for me. It's the wrap up and the gear up all in one. I finish projects that I started during the week, like the mountains of dishes and laundry, respectively, and plan the things I need to do, like put my new headboard up. I cleaned out the refrigerator and cooked some new things to fill it with, plus planned a menu [having a menu is one thing, actually sticking to it is completely different, haha]. All in all, it was a pretty successful Sunday, even though I wasted a couple hours this afternoon watching chick flicks :) I was folding laundry too!

I was called in yesterday for 3 hours, and I think it's safe to say now [with 30 minutes of call left] that I won't be called in today. It was good to see some people that I don't see unless I'm called in on a weekend. I can honestly say that, after nearly 2 years, I'm feeling comfortable in my role and with my coworkers. My dear Dr. Klinger, who will be leaving on the 31st [tear], told me, "Ziegs, you're a good girl--lady. You're a good one." That just made my day on Friday! I'm going to miss him so much. It's refreshing to see the human side of surgeons and physicians. It reminds us that the good ones don't have the god complex, which makes it all the more obvious which ones do. You've got the ones who genuinely want to help people, and then the ones who are concerned only with performing X number of procedures so they can buy that new [insert car/condo/designer clothing/etc]. It's taking your time to do the surgery right versus rushing through as many as you can in one day.

I'm off to read a little before crashing into bed. Hopefully my dreams of spring will come true and this unwelcome snow will be gone ;)

peace and love,
m

dante and sushi

Qui si convien lasciare ogne sospetto;ogne viltà convien che qui sia morta.

--Here must all distrust be left behind; all cowardice must be ended.

Canto III, lines 14-15

And just to make the title make sense, yes, I did have sushi for lunch. Spicy tuna avocado roll. And fresh berries. Yum! Tux thought he should get some sushi too, but I told him kitties don't get spicy tuna. He's sulking now.

peace and love,
m

happy spring!

It's officially spring [nevermind that it's 19 degrees F with the windchill]! Spring is one of my favorite times of the year because it symbolizes rebirth and renewal. I love seeing the buds on the trees, the daffodils and tulips poking through the earth, and the various shades of green that change our drab Wisconsin winterscape into a vibrant playground for summer. The birds come back, people are outside, and [hopefully] the parkas can be packed away until October.

I've been really busy lately. Work has been kicking my bum. We lost another nurse [she moved to Green Bay], and one of our travelers' contract doesn't start until the 29th. We're down to 7 nurses some days. Additionally, since I started in August 2007, 4 nurses who took call have left and none of them have been replaced, which means that the rest of us are taking a lot more call. In fact, I have 4 weekends of call coming up. We're supposed to be on one weekend, off the next, but it's not working out at all. It's really frustrating, and we're getting burned out. And the nurse who does the call schedule doesn't see that she's putting the same people on weekend after weekend! Oh, and it irks me that she doesn't have to take call because she does the schedule! Everyone should have to, and if you don't want the call you should have to try to get rid of it. Otherwise, suck it up!

In other news, Wolf and Sam are going at it one day at a time. His breathing is getting very labored and he is hallucinating sometimes. He doesn't eat a lot and is very, very skinny. He sleeps most of the time. Sam is being harrassed by the hospital for payments, and the social worker isn't doing her job very well. My mom had to call the hospital and tell them to stop calling Sam for money. I mean, she is watching her husband die in their living room. Back off and have some compassion for your fellow human beings. The insurance industry makes me sick, and hospitals aren't much better, especially ones that claim to be non-profit [cough*Aurora*cough]. It's all about the Almighty Dollar now, and the person is a secondary thought.

peace and love,
m

my <3 is breaking

On 2.24.09, my family got the bad news that my Uncle Wolf's cancer was back, and terminal. It is fast moving, and there is nothing they can do except make him comfortable in his last months. He was getting monthly CT scans, and he was clean on his January one, but the February one came back with a growth under his jawbone. Initially it was thought that he had 3-6 months, but it's gotten really bad really quickly, and we're not expecting him to make it past March. He's on heavy-duty painkillers and IV fluids, and it's hard for him to eat because the cancer makes it so painful to swallow.

I wish I could be there, especially for my aunt who having a very tough time. She is trying so hard to "do a good job" for Wolf that she isn't taking care of herself, but how do you tell someone who is losing their husband that she has to take time for herself? I just told her that she is doing a "good job" just by being there and loving him...but I know it's not the tangible answer she's looking for. It's not the answer I would be looking for either. As people we look for something to measure our actions in all situations...unfortunately, this isn't one that lends itself particularly well, or at all, to that. Nothing is enough when a loved one is dying.

So I guess I'll close it out by asking for positive energy, hope, love, and prayer if it's your thing for my aunt and uncle.

peace and love,
m.